Yes. The title speaks it all. I miss Malaysia. I miss daddy, mummy and my sisters. LOL..Sounds so childish but yea. I miss them all. Thats why I call home more frequent nowadays. Listening to their voices just soothes my soul. When I am alone and has nothing much to do, the urge to call them is just there. But since semester started, I had been pretty busy with tests coming up and thus I dont really think about home so much. Is that good or bad? I think its positive in a way as I am atleast not distracted because of homesick but the bad thing is, that should not be an excuse. NO matter what, they know I miss them. And that's adequate.
Besides my immediate family, I can't believe that my cousins in Malaysia actually miss me. That just so unbelievable. Webcam-ed with my cousins the other day and I realized one of my cousins is actually now wearing a pair of spectacles. She looked so different. Look like a total nerd..Lol. Everything was fun except for the fact that Kelly showed me her T-shirt. A Pangkor Island T-Shirt. She asked me, "Do you remember this?". I stopped for a moment as I really have no idea about that shirt. In the same time, she is just 8 year-old. I dont want to disappoint her. If she can remember, I should be able to remember too. But my mind was just blank. Seconds later, another cousin sister told me that Kelly got it wrong. They went to Pangkor mid of this year and so it is practically impossible for me to be with them. The point here is, Kelly actually thought I went to that trip. She forgot that I was actually not there. Living with her for one year is really long that it just makes her think that I am with them wherever they go. Hilarious.LOL...
Its end of August and instead of thinking about the finals that is drawing near, I am thinking about going home. Planning on what to do when I am back. Thats ridiculous. On the other hand, look at the bright side, that motivates me to study as the holidays will be so rewarding.
Till then!!!
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Thursday, July 30, 2009
New Challenges
Few days back was 27th of July which was also my beloved cousin, Claire's 21st birthday. It was kinda sad as I wasn't there to celebrate that memorable day with her. So practically, we chatted on facebook and Msn the whole night. As a way to accompany her so that she doesn't really feel like I was missing. Although she still don't want to admit that she misses me. 24 hours later, on the 28th, it was another cousin, Leanne's 21st. Unfortunately, I wasn't there too. Hope they will both have a great year ahead.
Semester started on the same day as Claire's birthday which was on the 27th. After a 3 weeks break, uni will surely give me a little bit of life as I had been rotting throughout the holidays. I dont know what I did but I am sure to tell that I was busy. LOL.. First lecture itself was a massive influx of informations. Sheridan lectured like a bullet train and I was just trying to catch all that she had said and try to keep them inside my brain. However, only 50% was absorbed. Poor thing. Since holiday, my brain lost it's maximum function speed. Might need a few days to recover. But for sure it won't take long.
Pharmacy Practice lecture was second. It was really nice as we had it in PM-06. After the renovations, it looked so good. It felt so much more comfortable and really gives me the mood to study as everything was just right. From the lighting, to the tables (which wont fall off as you dosed off) and also those seats (which gives me the feeling of chinese new year as it were all red). So yea..Definitely going to enjoy all the lectures in that lecture hall throughout this semester. This subject will be much more challenging this time as I just have a feeling I am going to enjoy it. Hopefully I will. With all those recordings and feedbacks, it actually really makes us improve more rather than like what we did last semester.
So I shall work hard for this semester to achieve what I did not achieve last sem.
I CAN DO IT!
Semester started on the same day as Claire's birthday which was on the 27th. After a 3 weeks break, uni will surely give me a little bit of life as I had been rotting throughout the holidays. I dont know what I did but I am sure to tell that I was busy. LOL.. First lecture itself was a massive influx of informations. Sheridan lectured like a bullet train and I was just trying to catch all that she had said and try to keep them inside my brain. However, only 50% was absorbed. Poor thing. Since holiday, my brain lost it's maximum function speed. Might need a few days to recover. But for sure it won't take long.
Pharmacy Practice lecture was second. It was really nice as we had it in PM-06. After the renovations, it looked so good. It felt so much more comfortable and really gives me the mood to study as everything was just right. From the lighting, to the tables (which wont fall off as you dosed off) and also those seats (which gives me the feeling of chinese new year as it were all red). So yea..Definitely going to enjoy all the lectures in that lecture hall throughout this semester. This subject will be much more challenging this time as I just have a feeling I am going to enjoy it. Hopefully I will. With all those recordings and feedbacks, it actually really makes us improve more rather than like what we did last semester.
So I shall work hard for this semester to achieve what I did not achieve last sem.
I CAN DO IT!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Who Am I
Have you ever wonder who are you and the purpose of you coming to this world? Frankly, I have never given much thought on this until today. The Girl's Ministry of OCF UniSA had a talk on this topic, Who Am I? Before this, I only have a few points on my characteristics in my mind. Not more nor deeper than that. But after today, 23th July 2009, I finally get a clearer point of who am I now. As Amanda shared, I started to reflect and realized how much I have changed. In the handouts given out, there were also columns to write down the positives and negatives experiences that have shaped who you are.
There were many thoughts on the positives but only one negative experience. That experience changed me so much that it is impossible to not realise it. As how the chinese put it, "Each family has it's own problem". At that point when it happened, I started to think, why must it happen to me? How could that? Everything was so normal and fine before this and I really cant accept the change. There are things that I did not imagine will happen or even ever thought it will happen. However, as time goes by, I started to slowly adapt to the situation. I know I have to learn because everything has changed and nothing can be done to reverse that situation. Unfortunately, as time goes by, things did not get better but became worse. I remembered I just hate those situations and everything at home became very stressful for me. For the first time I felt things were so out of control and I just hate it because whatever that is happening is not within my expectations. It was far beyond that. At a level where I have no control at all. There is nothing I can do. I am just a helpless girl in that house. In a house where it contains my once perfect family. Nevertheless, that incident had helped me to be a tougher person. I remembered I was crying like a baby when both my mum and maid came to give me support and courage to just continue the journey believing that things are going to be alright. Furthermore, as the eldest, I must take care of my sisters. I have the responsibility. Now, as years go by, that courage only grew stronger. Nothing can shake it. Once my friend asked me, why am I so realistic at times. How can I not be? Sometimes, people only see from the surface. Who would have ever thought that inside that beautiful house lives a family who once struggled to go on?
Only we ourselves know what exactly is happening. No one can understand us better than ourselves. Do not struggle to be accepted by the crowd as that is only temporal. Besides, you're already accepted as His child. Discovering is a long and exciting journey. It is never ending.
There were many thoughts on the positives but only one negative experience. That experience changed me so much that it is impossible to not realise it. As how the chinese put it, "Each family has it's own problem". At that point when it happened, I started to think, why must it happen to me? How could that? Everything was so normal and fine before this and I really cant accept the change. There are things that I did not imagine will happen or even ever thought it will happen. However, as time goes by, I started to slowly adapt to the situation. I know I have to learn because everything has changed and nothing can be done to reverse that situation. Unfortunately, as time goes by, things did not get better but became worse. I remembered I just hate those situations and everything at home became very stressful for me. For the first time I felt things were so out of control and I just hate it because whatever that is happening is not within my expectations. It was far beyond that. At a level where I have no control at all. There is nothing I can do. I am just a helpless girl in that house. In a house where it contains my once perfect family. Nevertheless, that incident had helped me to be a tougher person. I remembered I was crying like a baby when both my mum and maid came to give me support and courage to just continue the journey believing that things are going to be alright. Furthermore, as the eldest, I must take care of my sisters. I have the responsibility. Now, as years go by, that courage only grew stronger. Nothing can shake it. Once my friend asked me, why am I so realistic at times. How can I not be? Sometimes, people only see from the surface. Who would have ever thought that inside that beautiful house lives a family who once struggled to go on?
Only we ourselves know what exactly is happening. No one can understand us better than ourselves. Do not struggle to be accepted by the crowd as that is only temporal. Besides, you're already accepted as His child. Discovering is a long and exciting journey. It is never ending.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Holiday life
3weeks of holiday and now 1 week left..Time flies. 1st week was merely rotting for me. Sleeping time :am, Waking up time:pm. So pathetic. Negative: No life! But they always say. "Think positively". So the positive thing about living that life is saving money on breakfast and lunch. Especially when I am now spending in dollar and not RM.
Second week was so much better. At least I am doing some stuff. Finally I went for a jog. I was planning since I finished my last paper but I just can't seem to wake up to do that. But on Wednesday, I managed to move my butt out of the bed and get out of the apartment at 7am. Gosh, temperature was around like 6 degrees. So nice. Chilling. The weather was so good. The street was full of white collar workers heading for a coffee before getting into their offices. "I am breathing the fresh morning air", that was what I thought. Few kilometers down the track, I saw a rainbow. As what I will usually do, take out the phone from the pocket and snapped a photo of it. As I continued for another few meters, I felt a drop of water on my head. My heart was pounding as I really don't want it to rain. Seconds later, it drizzled. Before I can even decide whether to continue or to U-turn, it rained heavily. I had no choice but to run back. Hood up but no use as it kept falling off as I ran. Did not really bother but was just running as fast as I could so I can reach home in the shortest time. One thing for sure, I don't want to catch a cold just because I went for a jog. No way. As I reached the main street again, the rain stopped. Took a look at the time, 7.45am. I only jogged for around 30 minutes. That's not my plan. But it doesn't matter. Went home, took a hotbath, ate breakfast and off to Uni. For no reason but I just don't want to stay at home cause I know I will surely do some nonsense stuff. Then sushi for lunch. So delicious.
Besides, as I am a girl, and I can tell you that girls like sleepovers. Went to Lear's house on Thursday. Amazing plan. Nicole and I looked through the thick, few hundred pages baking book and finally decided on chocolate chips cookies and apple tarte tatin( One of the pressure test in MasterChefs). That's for our dessert. For main course, we had glutinous rice and salmon,lemon and spinach pasta. I have to say everything tasted really good except for the apple tarte tatin where I felt the apples were too sour and I am not a big fan of sour fruits. But overall, delicious. The cooking and baking part were fun but sadly, the temperature in the house was not so fun. The house felt like a freezer. It was so cold that we were all shivering except for the host. Lear: Cold? really? no what? I think it's very warm. So we stared at her thinking what was wrong and just ignored her. Her room was also very cold. I don't know how she managed to survive. We were awake turning around the whole night except for Lear. What a successful sleepover!
Results out. Some were more than what I expected but one was lower than what I was expecting. However, I am happy for it. Half a year to go!!!! I shall enjoy this coming week to the fullest before returning to the Uni-life routine..
Till then.
Second week was so much better. At least I am doing some stuff. Finally I went for a jog. I was planning since I finished my last paper but I just can't seem to wake up to do that. But on Wednesday, I managed to move my butt out of the bed and get out of the apartment at 7am. Gosh, temperature was around like 6 degrees. So nice. Chilling. The weather was so good. The street was full of white collar workers heading for a coffee before getting into their offices. "I am breathing the fresh morning air", that was what I thought. Few kilometers down the track, I saw a rainbow. As what I will usually do, take out the phone from the pocket and snapped a photo of it. As I continued for another few meters, I felt a drop of water on my head. My heart was pounding as I really don't want it to rain. Seconds later, it drizzled. Before I can even decide whether to continue or to U-turn, it rained heavily. I had no choice but to run back. Hood up but no use as it kept falling off as I ran. Did not really bother but was just running as fast as I could so I can reach home in the shortest time. One thing for sure, I don't want to catch a cold just because I went for a jog. No way. As I reached the main street again, the rain stopped. Took a look at the time, 7.45am. I only jogged for around 30 minutes. That's not my plan. But it doesn't matter. Went home, took a hotbath, ate breakfast and off to Uni. For no reason but I just don't want to stay at home cause I know I will surely do some nonsense stuff. Then sushi for lunch. So delicious.
Besides, as I am a girl, and I can tell you that girls like sleepovers. Went to Lear's house on Thursday. Amazing plan. Nicole and I looked through the thick, few hundred pages baking book and finally decided on chocolate chips cookies and apple tarte tatin( One of the pressure test in MasterChefs). That's for our dessert. For main course, we had glutinous rice and salmon,lemon and spinach pasta. I have to say everything tasted really good except for the apple tarte tatin where I felt the apples were too sour and I am not a big fan of sour fruits. But overall, delicious. The cooking and baking part were fun but sadly, the temperature in the house was not so fun. The house felt like a freezer. It was so cold that we were all shivering except for the host. Lear: Cold? really? no what? I think it's very warm. So we stared at her thinking what was wrong and just ignored her. Her room was also very cold. I don't know how she managed to survive. We were awake turning around the whole night except for Lear. What a successful sleepover!
Results out. Some were more than what I expected but one was lower than what I was expecting. However, I am happy for it. Half a year to go!!!! I shall enjoy this coming week to the fullest before returning to the Uni-life routine..
Till then.
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Sit back and relax!
Yes! Here I am.. Back again to just write something so at least people know I am alright and not infected by swine flu or something like that, because the last post was like a month ago.oops..It was actually 2 months ago.That was long..But not too long. Friends, don't worry about me. I am all fine, healthy and jumping around in Adelaide.
Exam is finally over and so, it's the kickstart for the 3 weeks holiday. Its time to play, watch movies and most importantly rest before the next semester starts. For the last couple of weeks, it had been just studying, studying and studying. Abandoning my social life. So, now it's the time to claim it back.
It is almost 4 days since my last paper and so far, everything was great. Hanging out with friends, 4plates of pasta in Ikea, cards till 2am, video shooting, fish n chips, beach side walk, ice-creams, reading and watching movies. So much fun.
But the best thing is, I finally found a place where I really belong. My room. Since I came, I have not really found a place where I can really feel comfortable. Everything is so different from at home. I miss my room, my table and just everything. But since holiday, I spend more time in my room doing my stuff. Out from the hectic world. Quarantine myself. Reading and just relaxing. So, it is now declared to be my private area. Yeah! I am back living in my cocoon. Thats what I like doing. Being more anti-social. Do things myself. I don't mean doing all things by myself, but I mean there are some things that I prefer to do it alone. I think it is because it allows me to think about myself rather than thinking about what people think of me. We have to first understand ourselves and I would say, I have not really understand myself yet.
Whatsoever it is, I am so blessed to be surrounded by people who care for me and people who lighten up my life. Love you guys!!
Back to movies although it is sleeping time.
Till then. XOXO!
Exam is finally over and so, it's the kickstart for the 3 weeks holiday. Its time to play, watch movies and most importantly rest before the next semester starts. For the last couple of weeks, it had been just studying, studying and studying. Abandoning my social life. So, now it's the time to claim it back.
It is almost 4 days since my last paper and so far, everything was great. Hanging out with friends, 4plates of pasta in Ikea, cards till 2am, video shooting, fish n chips, beach side walk, ice-creams, reading and watching movies. So much fun.
But the best thing is, I finally found a place where I really belong. My room. Since I came, I have not really found a place where I can really feel comfortable. Everything is so different from at home. I miss my room, my table and just everything. But since holiday, I spend more time in my room doing my stuff. Out from the hectic world. Quarantine myself. Reading and just relaxing. So, it is now declared to be my private area. Yeah! I am back living in my cocoon. Thats what I like doing. Being more anti-social. Do things myself. I don't mean doing all things by myself, but I mean there are some things that I prefer to do it alone. I think it is because it allows me to think about myself rather than thinking about what people think of me. We have to first understand ourselves and I would say, I have not really understand myself yet.
Whatsoever it is, I am so blessed to be surrounded by people who care for me and people who lighten up my life. Love you guys!!
Back to movies although it is sleeping time.
Till then. XOXO!
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Blog!
Like finally it is not dead. Short term memory lost I guess.. As browsing through facebook and it started to get boring, I suddenly remembered that I should visit my blog. Frankly speaking, I dont remember I have a blog for the past month. But its alright as the owner finally visit this link and write a new post.
Nowadays, I am kinda excited about cooking. Perhaps I was thinking that I would be out of home for a long time before returning and thus I should really cook properly and not just those simple dishes that I had been cooking for the past few months in Adelaide. Eat right! It might take up my time but I don't mind. I love cooking!! And improvement is what I am looking for everytime I cook. So I actually bought a few stuff that are vital for cooking so that the food will taste good. Go!!!
Easter break is over, back to Uni life. Assignments and Assessments. But not forgetting those wonderful coursemates that made my lectures and tutorial more exciting, fun and most importantly less boring. Though that stack of assignment is quite high, I believe I can finish them on time. There is less than 2 months to mid year exam that is the final exam for this semester. A little stress but I can manage it. I am learning to say "JUST DO IT" copyright Nike and not to say 'TRY". I should fight within myself and if I can achieve that, I should be glad. 100% attention in Uni and at home when I hit the books, focus more on those fine details than just the big picture as well as being more serious.
This blog will be dead again for some period of time. So don't bother on clicking this link as it might just make you end up saying "Still the same", "No updates" or just a sigh.
Till then.
Nowadays, I am kinda excited about cooking. Perhaps I was thinking that I would be out of home for a long time before returning and thus I should really cook properly and not just those simple dishes that I had been cooking for the past few months in Adelaide. Eat right! It might take up my time but I don't mind. I love cooking!! And improvement is what I am looking for everytime I cook. So I actually bought a few stuff that are vital for cooking so that the food will taste good. Go!!!
Easter break is over, back to Uni life. Assignments and Assessments. But not forgetting those wonderful coursemates that made my lectures and tutorial more exciting, fun and most importantly less boring. Though that stack of assignment is quite high, I believe I can finish them on time. There is less than 2 months to mid year exam that is the final exam for this semester. A little stress but I can manage it. I am learning to say "JUST DO IT" copyright Nike and not to say 'TRY". I should fight within myself and if I can achieve that, I should be glad. 100% attention in Uni and at home when I hit the books, focus more on those fine details than just the big picture as well as being more serious.
This blog will be dead again for some period of time. So don't bother on clicking this link as it might just make you end up saying "Still the same", "No updates" or just a sigh.
Till then.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Upside Down
The air is filled with laughter yet you feel so lonely.
Your world might be filled with people, yet you feel so lonely.
Have you ever felt that way? We are always afraid of being alone. But sometimes you just feel like whatever that is going around you is just like a story. Somehow somewhat the story ends and there is no fairy tale. So we still need to go on. People only see the external side which includes what you say and do. Deep down inside, there will always be a secret door where only you yourself have the key to unlock the door. Only you but no one else.
Sometimes, the world is spinning so fast that you just cant catch the pace. So in the end, you were left behind. How you wished or felt pressured to run faster so you can be among them. However, you know that no matter what, you just can’t. As you look around, there will surely be people whom were also left behind. Perhaps, it feels better to be among them than those who are of different speed. Just think, if you were to force yourself to run with those in front, can you bear the pressure? Can you really do it? Living a life of your own is more important than living a life where you think people want you to live.
Nowadays, I had been feeling really out of place. There are a lot of things that is going around not the way I thought it would be. But, I chose to shut up and just live with it. I felt like screaming my lungs out but silently. I prefer to keep it to myself. Perhaps, I am not used to telling people. I am not that type who really share. So just go on like nothing is happening. As time will pass and tomorrow will be a better day.
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